Do you even know how much it meant to me when you texted me the day after just to check on me? It made me feel very fucking special and loved. I don’t understand everything I do or say, no matter how hard to believe that is, but I do know what I want in my life, and that is you. Yes, I have shit I need to work on, but so does everyone else in this world. I don’t know how my self esteem got so low, but it just made me want to die.. I’m already getting better now as we speak. Once I feel better about myself enough, I want us to work everything out. I know I’m not losing you as my best friend, that has already been made clear. I just don’t want to lose you as my fiance. I know you wouldn’t just propose to me if you didn’t mean it. I have to mean something to you, and I hope it’s enough to still want to be with me and work on our issues. I couldn’t be more proud to say that I am with you. I truly am in love with you and I always have been. It’s still going strong on my end… I just hope it is on your end as well. Please don’t just give up on me and move on to the next girl. I’m not ready to throw everything away.. I don’t want to have to…. I love you. <3
I didn’t even get a new lead pencil that morning. :(
…why would there be pencils in the bathroom?
Right when I was on the verge of giving up hope and moving on, you finally talked to me again. I guess when you realized you could lose me forever, you tossed aside your stubbornness, insecurities, and whatever else and you picked me right back up. Please don’t ever push me down again. The third time I might not get back up. I’m so happy and glad that I have you back and I hope you realize your stuck with me. You and I have literally made it through thick and thin and love hasn’t given up on us yet. I love you, always have and always will.